The Five Elements of Storytelling (REVISION)

Emma Liggett

     "Your story needs a lot of work. This is an advanced writing class, and you write like you've never tried to tell a story before. Work on the five elements of storytelling: Plot, conflict, character, setting, and theme. If your rough draft was anything to go by, you have a long way to go. Good luck. I have a feeling you're going to need it."

***

     Just two weeks until my story is due. This has to be the hardest writing course I've ever taken. It seems like everything I know has been turned on its head. But you know what? Fine. This teacher wants something special? I'll give them something special.

     First, the plot. Work on that first. Characters can come later. If you have a plot, then who needs interesting characters, right?

     And the plot has to be complicated. Nobody likes simple stories. No, everybody's got it figured out. Every story that could possibly be written has already been told a thousand times. Man vs man, man vs nature, student vs some godawful assignment, the list goes on. Dress them up however you want, but the stories are always the same when you get right down to it.

     Nobody wants to listen to a simple story. The readers want it as dark as can be. They want a long lost brother to pop in halfway through the story, just to shake things up. The long lost brother has to be a serial killer, because why not? It makes things interesting. And a few more pages after that, an insane billionaire tries to destroy the earth. Why? Because it makes for an interesting, dark, gloomy plot. There's no need to try and keep things simple. No, the more convoluted the story, the more interested the readers will be. Readers can't be trusted to keep reading a story if it takes a moment to breathe. They need to see action at every turn.

     But always remember to keep things dark. Readers love it when things are gloomy. Take out any happiness in this story. They say happy endings only exist in stories, right? Well, now they don't even exist here. Make Rapunzel hang her Prince Charming from her shimmering locks. Have the little mermaid drag her Prince to his watery grave and tear out his throat, his gargled screams dying in the blood-darkened waters. Make the three bears devour Goldilocks, and make sure to point out the underlying message of innocence being lost, because readers are idiots who can't decipher meaning for themselves. And make sure the reader knows that your story is extremely artistic, because it's dark. And a dark plot automatically makes your story good.

***

     "I've read over the ideas you sent me, and I have to say, you seem to have a better grasp of your story. But there are other elements to a story than plot. See if you can work on the conflict a little more, and get back to me when you've got it."

***

     Okay. Now we're getting somewhere. Now I think I know what this teacher likes to see in a story. Maybe my grades won't suffer as badly as I originally thought.

     After plot comes conflict. The two are so similar, why bother create a separate category for it? Conflict is what gets the plot moving. If there's no conflict, then there's no plot. The two can't exist without each other.

     Conflict can be found everywhere. But the kind of conflict you choose is what makes your story interesting. Should my story be about a girl trying to find peace after the death of her mother? No, of course not. That's much too simple. We're trying to make things dark, remember? The dead mother is a good touch, but there needs to be something more. Make her death more dramatic. Take a hint from Disney, the company who has more dead parents than an orphanage. Shoot her. Let her be trampled by wildebeests. Drag her down to hell. Any of those would create great conflict, and not to mention, it would keep the story dark.

     Maybe the conflict starts when her mother returns as a zombie and tries to eat her daughter's brains? I can see it now. She crawls from the dry earth, fingers bloodied and raw from scratching at her coffin and clawing her way through the ground. She emerges from the dirt, her grey skin hanging like tattered paper. And then the conflict only escalates when the daughter has to shoot her mother. But then aliens warp in to abduct both of them, leading to a spaceship full of alien zombies. And then they warp to another dimension that's filled with elves and castles and other fantasy tropes.

     No, that won't work. I can't turn this into a fantasy story. Realistic fiction is all the rage nowadays, and you have to write what readers want to read. Readers don't want a story that builds a new world. They want a story set in a world they're already familiar with, a story that's familiar and follows the same tropes they've grown used to. Heck, even most fantasy stories nowadays follow all the same tropes. Really, think about it.

     On the first page of a fantasy story, the main character is late for something. Probably the fair. Which is a big deal, because the main character never misses the fair. The main character's mother affectionately chides her child. She'll be dead in the next few pages. The main character never met their father, because he died when they were young. But they remember his strong hands, since he fished or carpentered or did something with them.

     And worldbuilding in a fantasy setting? That's easy too. There's two religions in the entire universe. One resembles Islam. It's only practiced by villains. The other is 'being a Viking'. There is only one City. It's said with a capital C. It is the only city. There is one body of water. It is called the Sea. Or the Great Sea, if the author was feeling fancy. The world has no major exports, no centralized government, and no banking system. Every nobleman hides a viper in his smile. And last but not least, a bard has to provide occasional comic relief. Nobody invited him.

     The people know what they want. You feed people the same old formula time and time again, and they learn to like it. They don't know there's anything new or original out there, because they've become complacent with shit.

     The people want conflict. Lots of it. Lots of conflict makes a story interesting. Because we can relate to a story that's nothing but conflict and dark themes. At every turn is something the reader wasn't expecting. They don't want a simple conflict, like a girl's inner conflict to listen to her mother when she tells her not to chase a boy who's running off to college. They don't want to see the fight with her mother that causes them to drift apart, or the heartbreak the girl feels when the boy chases after someone else. They don't want that. They want dark themes and external torment.

     Plot and conflict go hand in hand. The more confusing they are, the more you can confuse your reader into thinking they're actually reading something worthwhile. Unfortunately, it's a little harder for me to trick myself into believing what I'm writing is anything other than shit.

***

     “Very nice! I see you’ve taken some of my comments to heart! The few pages you sent me were very promising. With a bit more fine tuning, you might actually be able to pass this assignment with a C!”

***

     Next up, character.

     I need to come up with some characters. I need to pass this class. I need to keep my GPA up. I need to keep my scholarship. I can't afford to lose it and drop out. I can't go back. I can't.

     Whatever you do, don't make your characters interesting.

     People don't want interesting characters. They don't want complexity, they don't want characters who think, they don't want characters with flaws. Instead, they want characters with little to no personality. That way, anyone can project themselves onto the blank face of your blank character. Why do you think there's so little variation in main characters these days? Think about it.

     Most of the time, stories are about some beautiful girl who's beautiful in everyone's eyes- except her own. She sees herself as a plain Jane because, she's not like 'other' girls. You can tell she's not like 'other' girls because she has brown hair. She has 'deep' thoughts, unlike 'other' girls. Until one day, she meets a boy. And then she meets another boy. Love triangle ensues. Girl goes through some transformation, which often includes a sexual awakening. Story ends with most of your favorite characters dead, and the main character is now in a relationship with the boy who treated her horribly. Or they're dead too. Because like I said before, there can't be any happy endings. Nobody wants to see their favorite characters happy. We want things as dark as they can be.

     I tap my fingers rapidly on my keyboard as I create my characters. Force them to fit the story that was so haphazardly constructed. Like cardboard cutouts, they hold about as much personality as their plastic smiles. My main character needs to be the blandest of them all. She has to be medium height. Brown hair. Pale skin. Brown eyes. These are her only defining features. I can describe her however I want- 'her hair cascaded down her back, flowing like a river of amber honey. Her eyes draw in all who lock gazes with hers, melting like pools of warm chocolate.'- but that doesn't change the fact that she's as empty as a puppet. I control her, because without me, she would be lifeless. If she had any semblance of personality, then perhaps she would be able to leap off the page. Perhaps she would be able to connect with my readers, and they could love her despite her flaws. But no, she is an empty porcelain puppet. She is dead without me.

     I work on the rest of my characters, and do my best to bring these puppets to life. My main character is done, sitting in the corner, watching me with her dark, dead eyes. I never gave her a name. She's not meant to have one. She's meant to represent something, and that can't happen if she has a name. What does she represent? I don't know. I haven't tried to work on my theme yet.

     The main character has to be perfect, has to be bland. But minor characters are allowed minor quirks. I find myself liking them more than I like my main character, the nameless pale girl who is supposed to be the star of my show. These minor characters are supposed to be bland. I'm supposed to keep myself out of the story. But I want to put my own mark on this piece of shit story, so some of these minor characters walk away with pieces of me lodged deep inside.

     This character gets my anxiety.

     This character gets my fear of intimate relationships.

     This character gets my crippling fear of failure.

     And this character is me wearing a hat. It's a cute blue hat with a yellow bow. It reminds me of summer.

     I have to remember not to linger on these characters during my story. Otherwise my readers will get bored wondering where my nameless pale girl is. Because she represents them. She is the blank face they can use to look out over the stale world I'm creating. My readers don't want to think about other people's problems, least of all the problems of some author they barely know.

     Oh, I did it. I figured out what my pale girl represents. I'll have to come up with

something better, though. Maybe she represents loss of innocence, or maybe life, or

death, or something else that's been done a thousand times. But to me, that's what she'll

always represent. My readers, watching me through lifeless eyes.

***

     "Very good! Looks like you finally understand character! I have to say, your main character is so lull of personality, she has to be my favorite! But on the downside, I'm not a fan of some of the side characters. The character wearing the hat seems unneeded, maybe you should consider cutting them out of the story? Anyway, your main character

is what's important. Good effort!"

***

     I've never been good at coming up with settings.

     I actually kind of hate settings.

     Truth be told, I'm not a well traveled person. I grew up in a small town. The only experiences I have outside of the town I grew up in happened recently. Now that I'm going to college, I'm able to see much more of the world. But I still have a difficult time writing about settings. All I can write about are small towns where everyone's a racist and owns a truck.

     But I can make this work for me. All I have to do is romanticize the idea of living in a small town. It's not that hard to do. Authors have been doing it for years. I just have to think of my town and make a few small adjustments.

     The land where I come from is flat and dry. What's not covered by concrete and asphalt is covered with brown, dry grass that bites at bare feet. I just have to change it so the grass is green and soft, the plush grass tickling any bare feet that cross it. And there isn't any asphalt. Replace those with dirt roads that never seem to kick up any dust.

     You don't want a setting to have any life. Like the rest of your story, it has to be bland. Unless you're trying to represent something. Then you have to have a drastic shift in whatever you're describing. I can't have my empty main character come to a conclusion on her own. The problem she's facing has to be smacked across her face by something in the setting. When faced with death, all the plants in the town have to die. When zombies rise, the flowers have to start sprouting guns to help ward off the undead. Maybe it represents man's connection to nature. Or maybe I just have to throw subtlety out the window. Readers don't like subtlety.

     People can be part of the setting, too. People who have lived there for so long, the town would be different without them. People who take part of the town when they leave. Like the boy I used to know, a few years older than me but with a smile that could melt ice. The boy who left town and took my heart with him. The boy my mom warned me about and told me not to chase, told me he would break my heart, yet I followed him to a college town riding on a lucky scholarship. The boy who drove me away from my family. The boy who ended up chasing another heart along the way. The boy who drove me away from my mother, and prevented me from rekindling my relationship with my mom before she died in a car accident.

     Like a setting, these people can influence your life in ways you could have never expected. Like a setting, they loom against the background of your story, a constant reminder of where you come from, reminding you that you're not allowed to go back.

     Oh, and nobody is allowed to be racist. The crazy lady next door with no teeth and a confederate flag on the back of her truck needs to be changed. She has to bake apple pies and cool them off at her window, where she looks out at her semi-new minivan. She smiles, showing off all her perfectly straight teeth. God bless America. God bless this paper. Lord knows I need it.

***

     "You're really starting to get it! Great job! But your story could benefit from one more thing: theme. Right now, it's a good start, but a great story needs a great theme! Try adding some themes into your story, and maybe you'll finally have something worth

reading!"

***

     Finally, the theme.

     Some would say this is the most important part of any story. After all, in every English class, what did your teacher ask you to analyze? The theme.

     Themes are everywhere. Seriously. If the author tells you that the girl was wearing a blue shirt, it's not just a blue shirt. It's a manifestation of the author's depression and insecurities. It's a reflection of the frailty of man, it's a representation of a mystery greater than we could ever hope to understand. It's not just a blue shirt. No, any English student will tell you it's never just a blue shirt.

     My main character represents life. How could she not? She's supposed to be vibrant and beautiful, full of everything the reader wishes they could be. Her mother should represent death. Obviously. She's a zombie. The love triangle can represent the forces and good and evil struggling over life. Because even though the two guys I wrote are both decent, one of them has to represent evil in order for girls to get all hot and bothered by the bad boy. I gave him a leather jacket. Now he's the bad boy. The long lost brother who happens to be a serial killer for some reason can represent the uncertainty of life. The insane billionaire trying to destroy the world can also represent death. The plants that are sprouting guns can represent the struggle of life against death.

     In the end, death wins. My main character has to die. But I can't say I'm sad about it. She dies with her throat torn out by her mother, crimson blood staining her pale skin. She drops to the ground, just as lifeless as before, her dark eyes still and unmoving. Her mother shambles off to look for more prey, and love interest #1 rushes to the main character's side to cradle her in his arms and lament about the loss of all that is good in the world. That's what the story has to be. It has to be sad. It has to be dark.

     Nobody wants to read a simple story about a girl coming to terms with the death of her mother. Nobody wants to see the internal struggles she goes through- no, everyone wants to see external struggles. They want to see action and explosions. They want death. That's all they want. They don't want a resolution where the main character is able to come to terms with the loss of her mother and move on. They don't want an ending full of hope, where the main character is able to go home and look around at all that has changed, and know things will never be the same. But just because things won't be the same, that doesn't mean they won't get better. But no, they want the main character to die, in the saddest, most gruesome way possible.

     Print out the story. It's a bit long, and that might detract from my grade. I whisper a quick prayer to Bullshitticus, the patron saint of college students. Now that the story has been printed, flip through the pages. Take in the dozens of changes. But these changes were done for the better, weren't they? This is what the people want to read.

     This is what writing is supposed to be.

     This is art.

***

"I almost can't believe it. The final draft you submitted was much better than the first draft you gave me! The characters are relatable, the theme is excellent, the setting is idyllic, the plot is engaging, and the conflict keeps building! I especially loved the ending! It was tragic how the main character died, and I applaud your choice for killing off the character in the blue hat. Solid work! B-"